Holy Week

This week is Holy Week. It's the week between Jesus' triumphal entry into Jerusalem and his crucifixion. Tomorrow will be Good Friday (the day Christians observe the crucifixion) and Sunday will be Easter, the day we celebrate Christ's resurrection. I have not wanted to breeze through this week just marking days off the calendar and getting from 1 activity to the next. I have wanted to spend time thinking, contemplating, meditating on what this week is about. What must it have been for Jesus? How must it have been for him being treated like a king one day and a short week later being nailed to a cross like a common criminal? And the whole amazing thing about it is that he knew this was all going to happen and he still did it. "What love the Father has for us. A love beyond all measure..."

As a pastor's family it's hard sometimes to remember that this is indeed a very holy time and not just a time to get through services so we can go home and be a family again. And yet, it's also somewhat easier to be constantly thinking about it. As my husband prepares for the Good Friday and Easter Sunday services I pray for him. I pray for him to hear the words the Lord wants him to share. Easter is a very big Sunday where people who don't usually attend church come. It is the pivotal celebration in Christian faith. For without the Resurrection we would have no reason to follow Christ.

I love Easter. I love it more than Christmas. I love it because it's simpler. I love it because of what it means. I love it because I know my Savior loves me so much that he chose to die a horrendous death for me. I love it because he didn't stay dead but rose again so that I (and you!) might have eternal life. I love that I get together with my family, who also share in the knowledge of this saving grace, and I love that we'll be together in heaven one day. I love that we don't have to rush around like rats in a maze buying this, that and the other just to make sure it's a great holiday. I love Easter. It's not nearly as commercialized as Christmas and so to me, has kept a lot of its sanctity.

I hope as this week is winding down you have been able to take a moment, or several moments, to think about what this Holy Week means. What does it mean to you? If you do not know Jesus as your Savior and don't know where you'll spend eternity might I encourage you to either let me know or find that person you know beyond doubt is a Christian and talk to him/her? My prayer for you is that you don't go another Easter without knowing the saving grace Christ has for you and truly know what Easter is all about. If you do know Christ as your Savior make sure to take time and think about what this week was for Him. What it means for you.

A Crazy Weekend

It seems we have been doing a fantastic job at making sure our weekends are jam-packed with many activities, leaving us exhausted on Monday. This past weekend was no exception. My sister and BIL are trying to get some "minor" (HA!) home improvements done so they can put their house up for sale in a month. On Saturday my dad and David went down to their town to help my BIL demo their kitchen and the plan was to put it back together on Saturday too. Something about the best laid plans? :) Well, as we all know things never go as planned when it comes to construction, things went a bit slower, and my BIL and dad had to finish up a lot on Sunday. Cora and I spent Saturday at my parent's house, and I did my best to help my mom watch the kids. We were joined later in the afternoon by my sister and Sophia. We had supper and waited for our menfolk to return later in the evening. They were all exhausted, and we all parted ways shortly after their return to my parent's house.

Sunday was a crazy day for the Hardin family. We had planned weeks ago to take our niece, Sophia, to see "Peter and the Wolf" and she spent the night on Saturday as the concert was early afternoon on Sunday. David's mom and step dad came up for church with the purpose of watching Cora while we and Sophia went to the concert. Church was good (a bit more activity during the service then usual) and we were then off to lunch and the concert. The concert was EXCELLENT, and I do believe Sophia had a wonderful time! We returned to our house to find my in-laws, Cora, my sister and her 2 other kids waiting for us! We had a wild, crazy and good time the rest of the afternoon, pizza for supper and then wrangling all the kids into p.j.s. I fell into bed exhausted and spent but thankful for a good weekend with family. How was your weekend???

30 WEEKS!!!!!

REALLY? How is it possible that I'm 30 weeks pregnant today??????? That means I have 10 weeks to my due date. Obviously, I know the baby could come before then (YES!!!) or after that date (NO!!!!), but 10 weeks is doable. It seems just yesterday I was puking my guts out thinking I would be pregnant for the rest of my life and wondering why we thought we needed to add to our family. This has been a hard pregnancy, as I've mentioned several times. I'm not only going through pregnancy stuff, but also a lot of emotional baggage-unloading. It's been hard to do that unloading without the buffer of my Prozac, but somehow we're making it happen. Somehow God has sustained us and is continuing to do so.

As I think about the fact that we only have 10 weeks (give or take a couple) I'm starting to "panic" thinking of what all needs to be done!!!!!! We'll be getting 2 large projects done before the baby comes--fencing in the rest of our back yard and moving the washer and dryer up to the kitchen. I'll be glad when these 2 projects are done. They'll certainly make life so much easier. We have other "little" projects to get done--wash the windows, get some organizing done in closets, oh and get all the baby stuff organized! :) I'm also hoping to get some meals done up and in the freezer to make life easier after Baby Sprout comes. I have a lot of lofty plans, but I have learned/am learning during this pregnancy that I need to not have such high expectations of myself. I just have had ZERO energy this entire pregnancy and it's so frustrating for me, but I guess maybe God is trying to teach me something? :) :) :) So, I have my list, both on paper and mentally, but I'm also trying to give myself allowance if it doesn't all get done.

So, what is this baby up to this week? He is about 15 inches long and about 3 lbs. His eyes are still developing (as they'll keep doing even after birth). A pint and a half of amniotic fluid surrounds him, but that volume will decrease as he gets bigger and takes up more room in my uterus. It's crazy to think that pretty much all that's left for him to do is get chubby! :) I will be going to my midwife appointments every other week for 3 appointments and then start my weekly appointments. Me? I'm just getting larger, having troubles bending over and getting increasingly uncomfortable, which is just to get me excited to actually get this baby out! :) 


Here's a photo of my at 30 weeks. Yep, this baby is growing! 

Blog Ads--Disclaimer!

You may have noticed I have ads on my blog now. I'll get a small amount of money every time the ad is clicked on. The ads are supposed to correlate with my blog content, etc. However, I have noticed I'm getting a lot of Mormon ads! I just want you to know (if you're new to my blog) that I am NOT a Mormon, and I can't figure out how to get those ads off of my blog. So...if they don't start going away I may just forget the whole ad thing because I can't in good conscience advertise something I have no agreement with! Just wanted you to know!

Worshipping Differently

Sunday was an interesting Sunday for several 100 people. There are several churches here in our town who are going through the "Experiencing God" series during Lent. It's been so neat for David to participate in this with the other pastors and it's been encouraging to me to know there are several others learning the same things I'm learning during this time of the Christian calendar. In any case, the pastor's decided it would be fun to do a pulpit exchange one Sunday--that was this past Sunday. We got lucky enough to switch with the pastor who pastors at the church literally a few hundred yards from our house! :) It's an African-American church, which made it doubly exciting for us! David and I were greatly looking forward to our time of worship at this church. The way African-Americans worship speaks to my soul. Could be because the music, charisma, length of service, etc is more what I grew up with in Africa and so it touches a part of me that gets forgotten in our very "white" services! I was not disappointed by the service! Though I wasn't able to experience it as I had wanted to (due to needing to be in the nursery with Cora, as all she wanted to do was be up on stage with her daddy!!) I was able to hear and see on the TV in the nursery what was going on. God blessed the service and spoke through David, and I know hearts were touched.

Our time on Sunday has lead me to think about some stuff. What kind of worshipper are you? Are you the person who sits in the pew with her arms crossed making sure things go as they always do? Or, are you the person that loves it when there are different things happening during the service, to mix things up a bit? Have you never been in another church, because surely only your church does it the best way? Or, do you make it a point to experience a different worship service every now and again? And, no, I'm not talking about switching religions, but rather simply experiencing a different church. Just going to a different church (even if same denomination) can open you up to different ways of worshipping.

Please don't be "that" person in the pew who is against any and all things different. Don't be that old lady who gets all flustered if things don't go your way. Don't be that young person who is opposed to doing things traditionally. I mean, what do we think heaven is going to be like? Just so you know, I have a feeling we have NO IDEA what worship really is. I have a feeling we'll ALL be in for a rude awakening when we get to heaven and see what worship really is.

I want to challenge you to step outside of your box (even if taking a baby step means sitting on the other side of the sanctuary for now) and go be a visitor in a different church for a Sunday and see what you can learn. You might just find that the way you've been doing it all your life is somewhat boring, or could be improved upon! :) :) :) And, no, I'm not crazy! :)

Stream of Thoughts

Cora has taken to tumbling. Guess we need to invest in bandaids! Sunday she went down a slide (the very same slide she broke her leg on in October!!!), and when she hit the bend, it flipped her over on her belly, which meant she banged her head on the bend. She started screaming and I knew it was more than just a bump. As I'm hobbling off the playground (imagine over-stuffed bug) to get to her David tells me she's bleeding. Indeed, blood is coming from her nose and mouth. Sigh...she was essentially fine, but has a small bruise above her eyebrow and some scraps on her upper lip. We will no longer be using that slide...Sunday we were at our neighbor's house and Cora was running around with their daughters. She trips, falls and scraps/skins up both legs/knees. Blood is running but she was tough and didn't shed a tear. She even refused a Tinker Bell bandaid! :) Monday she and I were on our way out the door and I'm not sure how it happened, but suddenly I see her tumbling down the porch stairs. I let out a scream, David comes running and I realize she somehow stopped on the 2nd step, rather than going head long down all of them. I was SO THANKFUL!!!! No blood this time, but she did scrap her arm and I later noticed she bruised/banged/scraped her chin pretty badly. Oh, I don't know if I can handle this all summer long!!!!! :)

We seem to be thawing out up here in northern Ohio. Can I just tell you how THANKFUL I am???? Our neighbor's yards are producing lots of lovely daffodils, tulips, etc. Our yard, however could use some help! Though the sellers of the house put in some good, hearty bushes, there were no bulbs planted. That's OK. I will enjoy telling my mom and sister where to plant stuff (because bending over just isn't happening right now! :) ). I definitely want to plant bulbs in the fall though so next spring we have green goodness popping up too! :)

My new washer and dryer should be arriving tomorrow!!!!! WOOOHOOOOO!!!!!! The washer and dryer we have are (is?) not old--only 5ish years. However, we have found that they must have been lemons when we bought them because they have never worked well. we weren't planning to get something new so soon, but Lowe's was having a sale on Samsung front loaders we couldn't pass up and so, we bought them and they'll be here tomorrow! I can't wait to do my first load of laundry in them! I also can't wait to not have to do laundry all day long, as it takes me now! Yep, it takes my dryer TWO HOURS to do 1 load of drying. Brother! And, to make this all that much better, my dad and David will be running plumbing from the basement to the main floor of the house so the laundry can be up here!! I'm not sure what I'm more excited about--the new washer/dryer or the fact that our laundry will not longer be in the basement.

I'm 29 weeks pregnant this week! :) No, I can't believe that I have only 11 weeks until my due date. This means the baby could be here BEFORE then, and yes, I'm well aware it could be longer (but let's not think that way, K?). We have our to-do list and are slowly getting it done. I guess if it doesn't all get done that'll be OK too. As long as the fence gets put up in the back yard and the laundry gets moved up to the main floor I don't care about the rest. I have my next midwife appointment on Tuesday and thus will then start my appointments every 2 weeks (for 3 appts) and then we'll move to 1 appt a week!!! How has this gone so fast??????????? How are we at this point already???????

Next week starts Holy Week. It'll be a crazy, chaotic week for the pastor's family. I hope we're able to find some time to reflect on what this week means to our salvation. I hope we don't lose site of what Christ did for us on the cross so long ago. What will you be doing to prepare?

The Woman Behind the Man

I have been getting more and more into the blog world since I'm not stuck to a computer for work reasons any longer. I have been finding great encouragement from one blog in particular called Clutch. It's geared toward pastor's wives, missionary wives, basically the women who's husbands are in ministry in some way. It's a good blog--challenging, encouraging, and informative. As with any resource I take it as just that, a resource. I in no way agree with every single thing said, but rather use it as a resource and take parts. (I do this with parenting books, cook books, basically any resource other than Scripture.) This blog has really made me think about a lot of things from my seat in the sanctuary to what I should be doing to minister in church myself. They have a lot of guest bloggers, and I really enjoy reading what other women have to say about being the woman behind the man, so to speak. It's nice to know I'm not alone in different struggles, and it's nice to see others take a humorous look at things like I do! :)

In any case, I have been thinking about my husband's calling and how it affects our family. I have mentioned a lot that David does a great job at balancing church with family. It takes work, but it's work we feel is important. Churches come and go, but our family will always be here and well, isn't that worth preserving? I have been thinking about the sad situations where pastors leave ministry because of family reasons, usually centering around issues the wife may have. Now, let me just stay right now I am NOT talking about a woman with real, unsurmountable issues, mental, emotional, etc. which require her husband to take a step back to help his wife get through these things. I could very easily be that wife if I were not getting counseling right now. No, I'm talking about the wife who's issues are centered around selfishness. Selfishness that soon overpowers her and creates heart ache for her husband and ultimately prevents him from doing his job, from filling his call to ministry.

The man who is called to be in ministry has been specially called, I do believe. Yes, all Christians are "ministers" in some regard, but I truly believe that the man (or woman) who is called to shepherd, lead and guide God's people has a special and hard calling on his life and heaven forbid we, as wives, get in the way of that! There have been plenty of times when I have wished we could have a "real" weekend like everyone else. There have been plenty of times when I have wanted to make Christmas or Easter plans without having to work around church services. There have been plenty of times when I've been totally annoyed when the phone rings during family time and we're interrupted by whatever the person is calling about. However, I know this is what my husband has been called to do and quite frankly, for me to react selfishly is, well, wrong. I knew full well that he wanted to be a pastor when I married him. I had no idea what I was getting myself into, but I knew I was called to marry David and God would help me figure the rest out. I am called to be the woman behind the man. I am called to be a woman who supports her husband, to be his biggest fan, to be his cheerleader. I'm called to love him and encourage him, and I would hope I would do that regardless of his line of work.

I have come to see just how much influence I, as the wife, can have on my husband--for good and bad. There have been several times during our marriage I have had to apologize for not being a better support, for not being a better helpmeet. I am ashamed to say that, but it's true. Look at the wives/women in Scripture who had influence on their husband/man--Sarah, Rachel, Leah, Rebekah, Delilah. It didn't turn out so well for them. Rather than being a submissive woman they tended to manipulate their husbands in directions that met their own needs rather then letting their husbands do what was best. I do not want to be that wife. I do not want to be the puppeteer. I do not want to be the controlling factor to my husband. It's not how God set things up and like it or not, I need to remember that!

During our time of unemployment I saw first hand just how much my husband felt his calling. No, I never doubted it before that time, but I saw just how strong it was on him. For a while I simply wanted him to get a job, any job, but over time I saw this was not going to be good for him. He was called to do more then a "regular" job. He has been called to lead God's people in a different way. I changed my tune and did all I could to encourage him to not forget the calling God had placed on him and to not give up looking for a church to serve. When things were at their bleakest I knew God had a church for us, because I knew God had called David to be a pastor. I saw just how miserable my husband would be if he were not in the pulpit on a weekly basis. Why? Because it's what God had called him to do. And, when we're not doing what God has called us to do we can be pretty miserable.

And so, with those rambling thoughts, I am proud to be the woman behind this man. I'm proud to be a pastor's wife because I know this pastor is doing exactly what he's supposed to be doing and therefore my life is right where it needs to be. Does this make things easy? Heavens no! But, it gives me a foundation and a focal point. It helps me during those times of annoyance or family-time interruption to remember that this is what God has called David to, and ultimately our family, and I need to be behind my man, keep my mouth shut and pray for him to make good decisions for the church and our family. I need to not let my selfishness get in the way of his calling. I need to remember God has placed a special mark on my husband and as his wife I need to do everything I can to preserve him and his reputation. I need to be a woman whom he can be proud of at the end of the day because he knows I was behind him 100%.

And, now that I have said all of this you just know I'll be tested! :)